Friday, August 5, 2011

The Brits

**SMART ARSED ANSWER ****5**
> It was mealtime during a flight on a British Airways plane: "Would
you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked the man seated in the front row.
> "What are my choices?" the man asked.
> "Yes or no," she replied.*
**> **
**> SMART ARSED ANSWER 4***
> A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at a branch of
Sainsbury's but she couldn't find one big enough for her family.She asked a passing assistant, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
> The assistant replied, "I'm afraid not, they're dead." *
**> **
**> SMART ARSED ANSWER 3***
> The policeman got out of his car and the boy racer he stopped for
speeding, rolled down his window.
> "I've been waiting for you all day," the bobby said.
> The kid replied, "Well I got here as fast as I could."
> When the policeman finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid onhis way
without a ticket.*
**> **
**> SMART ARSED ANSWER 2*******
> A lorry driver was driving along on a country road. A sign came up
that read " Low Bridge Ahead. "Before he realised it, the bridge was directly ahead and he got stuck under it. Cars were backed up for miles. Finally, a police car arrived. The policeman got out of his car and walked to the lorry's cab and said to the driver, "Got stuck, eh?"
> The lorry driver said, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ranout of
diesel!"*
**> **
**> SMART ARSED ANSWER OF THE YEAR***
> A teacher at a polytechnic college reminded her pupils oftomorrow's
final exam."Now listen to me, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury,illness, or a death in your immediate family but that's it, no otherexcuses whatsoever!"
> A smart-arsed chappie at the back of the room raised his hand
andasked, "What would happen if I came in tomorrow suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?"
> The entire class was reduced tolaughterand sniggering. When silence
was restored, the teacher smiled at the student, shook her head and sweetly said, "Well, I would expect you to write the exam with your other hand."

Zebron and James


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